Grooooooooow babies!!

How 2 men + 2 women - sex + science = 2 babies!!

This is the funny, heart-warming, tearful, inspiring, and shocking truth about my journey to have a child.

How a man, another man, a woman, another woman, a couple lawyers, a few doctors, a psychologist, a couple social workers and some agencies make a baby.

Monday, July 1, 2013

To Freeze Or Not To Freeze, That Is The Question

It came again: that letter from the company that freezes embryos.  If memory serves me correctly this is the third years I've had to make a decision.  In 2010 I had my first embryos.  They were frozen of course.  By the end of 2010 I had one embryo and was advised to find a new egg donor, but I still kept that one embryo from the first donor.  In 2011 I had success with a new egg donor, transfered two fresh embryos and froze seven, I believe.

In 2012, about five months after the kids were born, I got my yearly bill again and decided to keep the embryos.  All sorts of "what if..." scenarios ran through my head and I was barely functioning due to the lack of sleep.  I wasn't ready to make any kind of big decision at that time.

It's now 2013 and I am blessed to have two happy, healthy, 15-month old boys and I'm pretty sure my baby making days are behind me, but only 99% sure.  There is still a little "what if..." way in the back of my head. 

I found out some interesting information about freezing sperm, eggs and embryos.  Here's what everyone should know...

  1. Sperm, to put it bluntly, is not valuable at all.  We all knew this.  I asked if there was anything that science could do with my frozen sperm and was told no. 
  2. Embryos can be discarded completely, donated to science for research, or donated to another person for him/her/them to use.  In my particular circumstance I had agreed in my contract not to donate my embryos to other people.
  3. If I choose to discard the embryos completely they are held for 60 days in case I change my mind.  After 60 days they will be discarded.
  4. If I choose to donate the embryos to science there are a lot of steps/parts.  After signing a consent form the embryos will stay frozen until they match the needs of a research project.  The woman I spoke with said she had been working at the lab for two years and has yet to have any embryos qualify for a project.  If the embryos are picked for research I will be contacted and I will have to sign a second form agreeing that I want my embryos donated.  But if, at that time, I decide not to donate my embryos to research, I can decide to reclaim my embryos and pay all the fees for storage in arrears. 
I'm wondering if anyone else has gone through this process and has any thoughts on it.  I don't want to be overly dramatic and say that this is the hardest decision of my life.  It's not.  But it's definitely a weighty decision.  If you have a perspective on this let me know. You can share it in a comment or contact me directly at  Thanks.